Disclaimer: If you don’t know what MASH is, you are excused from the smackdown only if you were born before 1982.
If you are 29 or younger and don’t know what I’m talking about, however, you will be beaten.
To put it plainly, MASH (Mansion, Apartment, Shack, House) is the only way to find out what will happen when you grow up. MASH is always right and should not be treated lightly.
It’s not a game. It’s your future.
This is easily the greatest thing on the internet.
After staring at it in amazement and fear, I knew I had to fill it out and roll the dice.
After picking my Magic Number (77, duh) it was time to see what the rest of my life would look like.
And you didn’t believe me when I said MASH wasn’t a game.
This, for better or for worse, has a 97% chance of playing out.
-I already assumed in 15 years I’d be driving around Atlanta in a two-tone hologram Maybach.
-The chances of a NOT Rashida Jones riding shotgun with 3 beautiful kids & 1 in the trunk is also comically high.
-As for Jobs… sigh.
You watched it go between Mayor and Corrupt Mayor. You saw that go down, right?
I always thought I’d one day be the one to save my city in the most honorable way possible. Now, I’m not to say MASH is wrong, but I have seen Minority Report 21 times and I know it is possible to change your pre-destined fate if you try hard enough.
I WILL NOT BE A CORRUPT MAYOR WITH A TWO-TONED HOLOGRAM MAYBACH LIVING IN AN APARTMENT ON CASCADE ROAD WITH MY 4 BEAUTIFUL KIDS AND MY SHORTY WITH THE 404 CELL PHONE NUMBER.
I WILL BE A GOOD MAYOR WITH A TWO-TONED HOLOGRAM MAYBACH LIVING IN AN APARTMENT ON CASCADE ROAD WITH MY 4 BEAUTIFUL KIDS AND MY SHORTY WITH THE 404 CELL PHONE NUMBER.
Sorry I’m not sorry, MASH. You going down, son.