Josie Done Got Old

Today is my dear friend Josie‘s 24th birthday.

I love her, but I also love to make fun of her. A lot. Like, I can’t stop.

I was about to write a long thing about Ms. Duffy, but an hour or so ago, I remembered that last year I made a blog solely dedicated to her early 23rd birthday party.

The text of that blog:

————-

No one really knows what was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

At what point did Josie transform from Josie Helen Duffy, eldest daughter of Norrene and Eugene, straight-A student, sunday-school leader, and mentor to small children everywhere —

to the Doof, estranged member of the Duffy household, frequent bar fight starter, and 3-term Treasurer of the Bloods?

To figure it out, we must start at the beginning.  This is the first picture of Josie Helen Duffy added on thefacebook.com, October 18th, 2005.

Look at her.  Happy, innocent, clothes fully on, no teardrop tattoos, and seemingly aware of where she is and who these people next to her are.

Fast forward 3 years, and we find a very different Josie.

Dropout.  Junkie.  Habitual rider of the 1 Train between Van Cortlandt Park and South Ferry 37 times a day, begging for money to fund what she claims is her “Tuition for Harvard Law School.”  Riiiiiight.

2 weeks ago, I saw The Doof as I got on the 1 Train at 116th and shook my head in sadness.  This wasn’t the Josie we’ve all come to know and love.  The old Josie had made 117 Facebook Albums and accumlated a whopping 2,194 2,195 2,196 2,197 in a mere 65 weeks.  That was the real Josie.

I asked her, what can we do to help?  How can we get the old Josie back?

First, she asked for two of these:

Then she said:

Quiero tener una fiesta para el Cinco de Mayo y para mi cumpleaños. Quiero que todos mis amigos allí. Quiero dejar de vivir en el tren 1. Quiero que la fiesta en mi casa. Esta es mi dirección. Quiero que el partido a las 9:30 pm. Quiero que todos mis amigos que se emborrachan y toman malas decisiones. Ahora deja, mientras termino mi KFC.

Not knowing Spanish, I’m pretty much guessing what the details were, but it sounded like a party invite.  What I gathered:

****************************
Event: Josie’s CINCO DE MAYO and Early 23rd Birthday Celebration
Date: Friday, May 7th, 2010
Time: 9:30pm until someone gets slapped with an arepa.
Location: 40 West 135th St, Apt. 8B
Attire: Dress like you are supposed to for a 5TH OF MAY PARTY
Attitude: Aggressively crunk

****************************

Everyone should show up.  Do it for Josie.  She needs this.

Burr.

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Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy
Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy

Day.

Love you, punk.

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About Rembert Browne

NYC via ATL //// rembert.browne@gmail.com 500daysasunder.wordpress.com
This entry was posted in Party Invites/Birthday Presents, Rando. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Josie Done Got Old

  1. doorr says:

    this girl is so adorable.

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